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When our son was born, he weighed 6 pounds 5 oz., and we had issues with him latching from the start. Part of the problem was I had flat nipples, so the nurse gave us a shield and showed me how to use it, and he seemed to do much better. He seemed to be a very content and alert baby. He lost almost 10 percent of his birth weight during our hospital stay, and we were discharged to see our pediatrician for a follow-up.
We continued to use the shield because he struggled to latch without it and were told to put it back on if he got frustrated trying to latch. I noticed that the shield would be full of milk when he finished. I also noticed that he wanted to eat for very long periods of time and didn’t seem ever to be settled during or after feeds.
My friends in Facebook mommy groups said this was pretty typical behavior and that he was just cluster feeding, so I continued to let him eat as often as he wanted, for as long as he wanted. I also never felt like my milk came in, at least not how my friends had described it. He didn’t get back up to his original weight by his 1-week visit, but the doctor didn’t seem overly concerned at that point because he had wet and dirty diapers.
At his 1 month appointment he only weighed 6 pounds 5.5 ounces. He had only gained ½ of an ounce and his pediatrician suggested I talk to the lactation consultant.
I went the next day to a group class, but the class was so large that I felt very overwhelmed and left early. I decided to attend the class offered at the hospital where he was born, where two of the nurses we met would be teaching the class. They had me first weigh him, feed him, and then weigh him again. When we weighed him after his hour-long feeding, the lactation consultant told me he had only eaten 20ml!
She suggested I start supplementing with formula and put me on a pumping schedule to try and increase my supply. We went home and immediately began the routine, and at the next week’s visit, he had gained nearly 2 pounds.
The nurse’s response was, “Wow! He must have been hungry.” He wasn’t just hungry, he was starving!
We continued the routine, and he continued to grow and thrive, but my supply didn’t seem to be increasing, and he still seemed so restless while nursing. The restlessness turned into full-on screaming after he nursed or drank a bottle of breast milk. I called his doctor, and she said it sounded like he had reflux. She prescribed Zantac and suggested that I cut dairy out of my diet. I met with my doctor for my 6-week postpartum checkup and told her about having to cut out dairy. She had experienced the same thing, so she sat down with me and went over things I could and couldn’t eat and what to look for on food labels. I also had a friend who did the same thing, so I followed her food plan, but he still would get so upset when he had any breast milk. After nearly a month of pumping every two hours, not eating, not sleeping, and trying to grieve the loss of my father, who had passed away two weeks before our son was born, I was an emotional mess.
My mom called me one day, and I was on the verge of a mental breakdown when she said, “he needs you to be healthy and sane far more than he needs breast milk.” At that moment, I felt a little bit of weight lift off my shoulders. I made an appointment to talk to his doctor about not breastfeeding. I had difficulty accepting it and worried that she might push me to keep breastfeeding.
Her beautiful response:
“You’ve tried harder than 99% of the moms I’ve worked with to make breast feeding work, and it’s totally OK if you stop and exclusively formula feed.”
I cried in my doctor’s office because that was the validation and permission I was looking for. I tried so hard to breastfeed my baby, but it was certainly not what was best for either of us. By his two-month appointment, he had more than doubled his weight, and at six months, he is back to being a happy, observant, content baby and so far meeting his milestones right on schedule.
Formula saved my baby’s life!
I have felt so guilty, and it took a tremendous amount of courage for me to write my story. At the same time, I am so thankful my baby is now thriving and feel it is extremely important for other moms to understand that if your baby is not gaining weight, it is critical to figure out why and not assume everything is normal, no matter what popular breastfeeding mom groups on Facebook might say!
Bottom line: I could have lost my baby and my own sanity. For me and my baby, #fedisbest
I will be forever grateful for finding the Fed Is Best Foundation, and I am now committed to working with their advocacy team to promote #SafeBreastfeeding.
My story one year later. What I learned.
I had countless moms—some that I knew personally, many I did not—send me messages thanking me for having the courage to share and for saying the things they were too ashamed to admit. I had a mother message me and tell me, “these were the words I so desperately needed to hear right now.” I had friends and family message me to say that their friend or family member from another state had shared our blog and how proud they were to tell them that they knew me. I had friends message me that they never truly believed that there were mothers who “couldn’t breastfeed” until they read my story.
I Shared My Story a Year Ago And I Was Told To Go Kill Myself – How I Am Healing
For more information on protecting your baby from feeding complications due to early exclusive breastfeeding, please read and download the Fed is Best Feeding Plan, a way to communicate your feeding choices to your health care providers.
In addition, please read and download the Fed is Best Weighing Protocol to prevent newborn dehydration and failure to thrive.
To learn how to supplement your baby:
How To Prepare For Supplementing When Breastfeeding Your Baby In The Hospital
Feeding Your Baby—When Supplementing Saves Breastfeeding and Saves Lives
.
Lastly, please watch our educational videos on Preventing Feeding Complications for more detailed information.
Our full list of parent resources can be found on our Resource Page.
HOW YOU CAN SUPPORT FED IS BEST
There are many ways you can support the mission of the Fed is Best Foundation. Please consider contributing in the following ways:
- Join the Fed is Best Volunteer group to help us reach Obstetric Health Providers to advocate for counseling of new mothers on the importance of safe infant feeding.
- Make a donation to the Fed is Best Foundation. We are using funds from donations to cover the cost of our website, our social media ads, and our printing and mailing costs to reach health providers and hospitals. We do not accept donations from breast- or formula-feeding companies, and 100% of your donations go toward these operational costs. All of the Foundation’s work is achieved via its supporters’ pro bono and volunteer work.
- Share the stories and the message of the Fed is Best Foundation through word-of-mouth, by posting on your social media page, and by sending our resources to expectant moms that you know. Share the Fed is Best campaign letter with everyone you know.
- Write a letter to your health providers and hospitals about the Fed is Best Foundation. Write them about feeding complications your child may have experienced.
- Print out our letter to obstetric providers and mail them to your local obstetricians, midwives, and family practitioners who provide obstetric care and hospitals.
- Write your local elected officials about what is happening to newborn babies in hospitals and ask for legal protection of newborn babies from underfeeding and the mother’s rights to honest, informed consent on the risks of insufficient feeding of breastfed babies.
- Send us your stories. Share with us your successes, your struggles, and everything in between. Every story saves another child from experiencing the same and teaches another mom how to feed her baby safely. Every voice contributes to change.
- Send us messages of support. We work daily to make infant feeding safe and supportive of every mother and child. Your messages of support keep us all going.
- Shop and Fed is Best Foundation will earn cash back! We hope to develop our online safe infant feeding classes with these funds.
- If you need support, we have a private support group– Join
We believe all babies deserve to be protected from hunger and thirst every single day of their life, and we believe that education on Safe Infant Feeding should be free. If you would like to donate to support the Fed is Best Foundation’s mission to teach every parent Safe Infant Feeding, please consider making a one-time or recurring donation to our organization.
Our daughter had problems eating too even from a bottle, many babies need to have a feeding evaluation covered under speech therapy to rule out things like being tongue tied or something else, wish they’d had that 30 yrs ago!!
Thank you so much for sharing this! My son is now a very healthy 20-month-old, but this is so very similar to our story. I was forced to introduce bottles and formula when he was 4 days old, as he started showing signs of dehydration. I’m so thankful we had a pediatrician who was supportive of my bf-ing efforts, but also honest with me about what he needed. I was also blessed with lactation consultants at our hospital (where we had several out-patient visits) who supported me through trying to increase my supply, but also encouraged me with “fed is best.” I wish I had seen morI stories like this before he was born, as I had always assumed that even if it was difficult, we’d be able to figure it out.
This is almost my same experience with my first son. He lost 11 oz in the hospital and then did not gain a single ounce for 4 weeks. I tried everything to make breastfeeding “successful” and after developing post-parting anxiety, I finally realized that all that really mattered at the end of the day was that my son and I were healthy. Formula saved my sanity and his life.
Bless your sweet heart! Thank you for sharing so other moms may see this.
My mom went through a similar situation with me. She had no supply and had to switch to formula…but then with my younger sister she had no issues.
It makes me sad that you needed validation to switch to formula… it it makes me sad because I am the same way! I am 5 months EBF with my third child, the furthest I’ve ever made it, but it means I am off some medications I feel like I am starting to need again.
Stay strong momma! You did the right thing! Fed is definitely best!
I could have wrote this article. I was up all night pumping every 2 hours, taking pills, drinking teas- she still lost weight. With my next 2 I supplemented from day 1. Thank you for writing this.
This is exactly the hell I went through with my son. At 1mth he was classified as failure to thrive. He had severe reflux, and we soent the better part of 4 mths in and out of Vancouver BC (an hour and 1/2 drive for me) seeing his gastro pediatrician. I had tried EVERYTHING, but the kid just never gained weight. He is now 5, tall and lean, but healthy. He deals with reflux still, abd has gone back on his medication.
Seeing the picture of your aon at 1mth brought back a flood of memories from that time. I didn’t share photos of him, we ever went out, I too was an emotional mess.
Thank you for having the courage to share your story!! Bottle fed with formula is NOT a terrible thing!! I’m lucky to have a happy healthy son now (most of the time ?!)
You should have reported and fired your pediatrician. How they could accept such a significant weight loss as normal is unacceptable! Just looking at your baby in the 1 month pic is obvious this baby wasn’t thriving. I’m a postpartum nurse at 10% weight loss we supplement with formula if mom can’t pump enough to supplement for stomach capacity. This makes me sick, I’m so sorry you were so horribly advised.
Thank you so much for telling your story. I also have flat nipples and had to use a shield. I tried everything in my power to breastfeed my son. Pumping after and in between, feeding for hours, crying everyday for months because I was only getting a few ounces a day and feeling like a failure because it didn’t work. I understand ? how you feel and we are just dedicated mommies who care so much. Sometimes life doesn’t go as planned but I just try to be thankful I get to be his mommy ☺️
Your courage is amazing! This was also my story and I still struggle to tell it through horrible judgement. You are not alone and you made a great choice. One of many difficult ones we makes as moms! #fedisbest ❤️
Thank you so much for sharing! This is why it’s so important for those of us who (mostly) breastfeed to be very careful with our words, and to not shame those who have to supplement. In most cases breast is best, but in ALL cases #fedisbest
Thank you so much for sharing your story! My story is much the same as yours and I carried a tremendous amount of guilt/shame from switching to formula. Women need to hear more stories like this so they don’t feel like failures! The pressure to breastfeed is incredible and I didn’t feel like I had anyone I could reach out to who struggled like I did. I didn’t feel like my husband understood the toll it took on my mental health. I ended up with ppd and I strongly believe that my struggle to feed had a lot to do with it. My baby is happy and healthy now on a great formula and I couldn’t be happier watching him grow.
Thanks again for having the courage to speak up!
Thank you for sharing your story. There seems to be a stigma against women if you don’t breastfeed. It’s important that mothers support one another no matter how they chose to feed and love their baby.
This is EXCATLY what happened with my daughter I didn’t get a supply and she wasn’t gaining. You did the correct thing. #fedisbest
I had the same thing happen with my oldest. I breastfed him for 6 months and for now reason my milk supply started to decrease. I tried EVERYTHING malt, mothers milk, oatmeal, pumping, etc. but it just wasn’t working. I had a check up with the doctor and when I returned my baby had lost 2 ounces over a weekend. That was when I realized he was starving and I needed to start on formula. I had a wonderful doctor who said that they don’t understand why things like this happen but it does! I lost my milk at 8 months with my second and 11 months with my third. Everybody’s body is different! I felt so guilty at first because ‘breast is best’ is so largely promoted. But I love this because the truth is ‘FED IS BEST!’ Thank you for sharing your story!
Thank you for being so brave to write this article. I am sure many mums face this situation. I remember reading a book called “The Myth of Motherhood” which showed that bottle fed babies do just as well as breast fed ones.
I’m fighting back tears, because I struggled so much an ended up exclusively ff and the guilt is real.
What a beautiful article. I struggled with breastfeeding as well and it’s amazing the guilt we put on ourselves. I felt like I was the only Mom that wasn’t getting a “normal” supply. I thought my body should be producing more milk, but it didn’t! Keep sharing so other Moms can realize they aren’t alone and it’s okay if you need to use formula. Fed is best!
Thank you for this. My now 22-year-old had the same issues. I successfully breastfed my next two children after that, but resorted to formula at 8 weeks and a dehydrated baby with my first birth. Everybody made it look so easy and I was so determined, yet got so discouraged. There was so much relief when we started formula. And, honestly, I can’t tell any difference in the health of my failure to thrive formula fed baby and my other two breastfed ones.
Your story sounds eerily similar to mine, I was grieving my father who committed suicide 6 days prior to my first daughter being born.
My daughter was always hungry, never content. I feel like the latch wasn’t right, the milk wasn’t right and she was too hungry but at the time everyone just said it was ‘normal’ and to keep trying. I continued with blistered nipples, feeding so often for so long that I generally only had half an hour to an hour breaks some days and in the end I was trying to pump in the middle of the night to increase my supply and I bled into the pump. I woke my husband up and cried to him I couldn’t do it any more. It broke my heart. I made it to 3 months and was so embarrassed that I couldn’t continue.
She’s now a happy, healthy, thriving 18 month old! She had been on thickened formula due to reflux and she’s weaned herself down to a tiny bit in the evening to help her get to sleep. She still loves her food though, always hungry.
I now also have a 3 month old too (just over 3 months) and she is feeding just fine, in fact when I was sick last week I decided that it wouldn’t hurt to add a sneaky little bit of formula at night to ensure she was getting enough nutrients (I can’t believe I thought that after struggling so much with my first) and she refused it, wouldn’t take it at all, so I guess this time is going better!
It’s so nice to have a little one be satisfied after feeding, whether it be that first bottle of formula when I gave in for my first daughter or a big breastfeed to sleep with my second.
#fedisDEFINITELYbest
I forgot to add:
Thank you for sharing, you don’t know how many heart strings this pulled for me.
I hope you’re all doing well now.
Sending love and good vibes!
x
I walked that road twice with my two babies. With the first baby the lactation consultants had me doing all sorts of contortions with all sorts of contraptions. Feeding and pumping was an all day and night affair for all of us including my husband. After a month I realized our family was drowning and I made the hard decision to quit. With baby number two – my milk cane in a little better but not all the way. After big tears, I told the lactation specialists that breast feeding was supposed to be natural and everyone that did it successfully just plopped on the couch and didn’t think twice about it even if they initially needed help. I breast fed for three weeks and then got a stomach virus for 5 days that wore me out. At that point again I decided the hard decision for our family was #fedisbest! Thank you for sharing! I’m sorry for your difficulties. There is so much pressure. As a soon to be FNP, I will remember our stories and share with my patients who are struggling – that fed is best!
Oh my gosh. The feels! I did much the same thing with my first kid. I ended up supplementing and it was hard to accept but I’m so glad now that I did. ❤
My story is almost exactly the same. So glad You were able to get help like I did.
Thank you for this! I cried reading it because this was our story almost exactly! I still feel sad that breastfeeding isn’t the exclusive way to feed my baby but she is thriving and that is what I want in the end. I have a happy and healthy baby girl who is loved and fed 😉
The same thing happened with me many years ago. My son (now 40) was not thriving and gaining weight either. Within about a two week period I had no milk and my son was burping up blood. Everyone told me to just keep trying that if I didn’t feed him the milk would not come in. I called my doctor and told him what was going on and he asked me , “Are you breast feeding?” When I said yes, he said, “Get him on formula right away and stop trying to breast feed.” That released me from the trauma that was taking place with me and my little son. I was so glad to see him eat. What I found out later was that, mistakenly, the doctor had give me a shot to dry up the milk because he thought I was going to bottle feed, hence the blood. It seems a lack of good communication on several levels is the culprit. When I look at the before and after pictures of your son, I see mine. Thank you for sharing.
wow, this really touched my heart because I went through almost the same experience with my first born and no one understood how hard it was for me to realize and come to terms with the fact that I just didnt have enough milk for him. The guilt I still feel for having starved my baby his first month.
Thank you for this article.
My baby was born 6 weeks early-he had a hard time latching on and they couldn’t find a shield small enough for him to use. He is 6 weeks old (today is actually his due date) and he has only latched a hand full of times. I was supplementing with a formula for preemies and then the formula became more exclusive, I have struggled to get my milk supply to come in fully. I, like you, just needed validation from my doctor that, in a world where breastfeeding is shoved down your throat by doctors, pediatricians and some fellow mommies, that it is okay to use formula. He got my colostrum and my breast milk for the first two weeks and after that, he’s mostly had formula. I’ve tried all of the things the doctors told me to try to get my milk in naturally and it just hadn’t happened. I’m glad to know I’m not alone
This brings tears to my eyes as I read this. I haven’t been able to breast feed any of my babies, because I just can’t make enough for them. I feel her pain of guilt, frustration, sadness, and mental break down. And it didn’t help with people asking me if I think that I may have “post par tum depression.” I understand they wanted to help and they were worried about me. But that wasn’t it. With my first baby and as a first time mom, I had nurses telling me that I need to feed her and keep trying. “She has to eat,” they kept telling me (as if it was the only way my child was going to get food). And the nurses would leave the room with no direction of help and only ask if I needed anything maybe an hour later. They’re lack of help didn’t help with trying. It just added so much stress and the continued thought of “what’s wrong with me?” as I left the hospital with my newborn. I had a nurse at my doctor’s office for my follow up, who asked me, “oh, bottle? Haven’t you tried breast feeding her?” She probably meant well asking, but I was so mad and started crying. I finally asked our family doctor what to do at her first follow up. He said it was perfectly fine to use formula. He gave me peace of mind and that nothing is wrong with me. He said to just give her formula so I can rest easier (mind and body) and that baby would get better at the same time. He could see how stressed I was and how broken I felt. (We still continue to see the same doctor with all our kids.) I was annoyed with people asking me “why are you bottle feeding?” I was tired of people making me feel like there was something wrong with me. This mom in the article did so much to try “the right way” to feed her child. It’s so hard on moms, especially new moms because they are not told before if they have any problems, that’s OK to use formula and not to feel guilty. You do what you can for your child and what’s best for yourself at the moment to keep each of you happy and healthy.
I have a VERY similar story. My son only gained 2.5 oz. By 5 weeks old. I contacted the lactation consultants, Le Lache League, seasoned nursing moms, etc. I even had him lapping up my breastmilk from a medicine cup, like a kitten.
I had a sister who was nursing her second child at the same time. I was so envious of her milk supply. She would manually pump 6oz. In a matter of seconds. It took me 10-15 min to pump 1 oz. It was suggested that I try to trick my body into thinking I had twins. So, I would pump and nurse and feed and wash all the tiny piece parts of my electric pump. All that would take me 1 1/2 hrs. And I was to be doing this every 2 hours?? I was faithful, diligent, and committed.
I was also, sleep deprived, anxious, and emotionally exhausted. I couldn’t find a baby scale, so I would drive across town to the grocery store where I would place a receiving blanket in the produce scale and then place my son on the scale to see how much he weighed. I would retreat back to my car and nurse him in the back seat. Then, trek us back into the produce section and weigh him again to see how many ounces he ate. I was trying so hard! I desperately wanted him to exclusively breastfeed. I was failing us both…
My husband, sisters, parents, and nursing friends were all very supportive. But it wasn’t until I saw a picture I had taken of him that I realized how thin he was. I immediately called the dr and it was confirmed he had only gained 2.5 oz. Since birth, nearly six weeks prior.
I gave him his first bottle of formula as soon as we got home from the Dr. He ate and ate and ate… I felt such relief. Huge pressure off of my shoulders. But… I was sad too… Why couldn’t I feed him the way God had designed?
I continued with formula, but would breastfeed three times a day until he was six mos. and he decided he was no longer interested in nursing.
My son is currently nine years old. A healthy, active, intellegent, boy. Today, I thank God for formula!! If it weren’t for formula, my son would have not have survived. I too believe fed is best!!!
thank you for writing this. This is so similar to my experience. i tired so hard to make it work and no matter what i did or how bad i felt, it just didn’t. In the end healthy baby and healthy mom are the only important things.
Thank you for sharing your story. I tried so hard to breast feed and then to pump and it just didn’t work for us. My baby was constantly screaming because she was starving. I was a wreak because right after birth that is extremely hard to take. Once we started formula she was so happy and content. I know she wasn’t getting enough to eat and that was why she was so unhappy.
Thank you so much for sharing! I experienced the same thing with my first and still felt the guilt with other 2 children. It’s nice to know doctors and pediatricians support mom’s in this!
Thank you for sharing your story, it’s very important for us moms to ensure that our baby is happy and healthy and if that happens through formula then its perfectly ok. So glad you seeked help right away and was guided by the right people! Amazing!
100% YES. So much like what I experienced! If I could tell myself back then these next 5 sentences, I would have had sanity: No, he’s not just colicky. Him not gaining weight in the second and third week is not normal. No technique is making him satisfied after a feed. Nope, kids don’t cluster feed for an entire month. He will acually be happy and quiet if you supplement, and I, your future self, give you full permission to do so.
This sounds like my start at breastfeeding 🙁 Horrible time trying to latch, was cut and bleeding to the point where I stopped latching him and just pumped which was almost just as painful. I had to pump then dump the first little bit because I would bleed into the milk and I didn’t think that would be healthy for him. Tried to supplement with formula but he would throw it back up every time 🙁 He stayed so small. Lost the 10% of his birth weight and was very very slow at gaining weight. His Dr kept saying that maybe he is just a small kid. Went and saw a lactation consultant and she got me latching properly where it didn’t hurt and I cried. I cried and cried and cried when I heard him gulping back my milk. He gained his weight back but slowly. Now at just over 2 he is heavier and taller than his friends that are 2 months and 5 months older than him! Now almost due wth my second babe I am so excited to try breastfeeding again with all the stuff I have learned and gone through. Bottom line is you know your kid. If you feel something is wrong then keep seeking help. Thats why they have lactation consultants and doctors and also fellow moms! Fed is definitely best!
Thanks for sharing your story. I too struggled with nursing. My husband is convinced that our 1st 3 were underfed most of the time. He would give them bottles when I just couldn’t nurse anymore. By baby #4 I gave in and I went to bottles after 2 weeks, she was my easiest baby. Now #5 is due in a few months and I would love to try to breastfeed again, but I am worried that I will get caught up in the negative cycle and become a mess. It is so hard that something so natural and easy for most can be so hard for me!
I have never seen anyone say a baby who is not gaining weight is ok. Never. The pediatrician dropped the ball on this one. Not checking on a baby from one week until one month? Disgraceful example of the problem of our health care system where we are all numbers.
Thank you for writing this, I had breastfeeding issues with both my kids, not only due to low supply but allergies and intolerances… with my oldest I was a mess as I felt I had failed her big time, but I would get 3oz a day even pumping every two hours… she would scream as well, because her lactose intolerance which doctors kept telling me was not possible… turned out she was and she developed anemia!
With my second it was a new start and a full mindset of exclusive breastfeeding idea again, trying to amend… with all the possible supplements to increase supply, hospital pump, etc, she was severely allergic to dairy and lactose intolerant too, so here goes fail again!. Although this time around she had a restricted special diet since her first week.
I remember that feeling, when the doctor, nurses and lactation consultants told me it was healthier for her and my sake to adjust to the idea I wasn’t going to breastfeeding mom, and it was ok. I was not OK at their time, hormones play us tricks anyway and once more it took a while to get the idea in my heart and mind that bottle feeding did not make me a bad and unaturalized mom like a lot of people wants to make it sound, yes in those judgemental groups I shouldn’t read in first place.
Well at the end, we are all happy, with still restricted diets but kids growing healthy and happy like it really matters!
I had the same experience after having my baby. It took 10 days for my milk to come in and was on the highest dose of meds the doctor could prescribe but it felt like all I was doing was feeding our son. In 1 week he gained an ounce and was not my happy baby. I was devestated and felt like I was failing! I went back to pumping and supplementing with formula, but not without guilt. In 3 days he put on over a pound and was slowly starting to cry less. I pumped and supplemented with formula until our 1 month appointment where my doc gave me the ok to stop breastfeeding and gave me a big speech about how my baby will grow and be healthy no matter where he gets his food. I won’t lie, I still feel like I failed my son but all that matter is that he is healthy and growing. He is 3 months today and is always happy and smiling which makes for one happy mommy
My daughter and I just went through the very same thing. At 5 weeks old, she felt lighter than she had been previously, it turned out I was right. She was losing weight instead of gaining weight. I immediately made an appointment to see the pediatrician since our next appointment wasn’t until two months. The pediatrician suggested supplementing every feeding. Once she gained a full pound in a week, he thought it was because my milk had come back and suggested I stop supplementing. Rookie mistake, I did. Over Christmas weekend, the fussiness returned. She was eating nonstop. When I took her to get weighed, she had lost weight again! No more! I refuse to starve my baby because someone else says breast is best! Fed is best. 3 weeks later, she’s happy, healthy and on track with formula! I’m all for breastfeeding but not at the expense of my baby.
Thank you for sharing your story! Its so helpful to see someone else’s story similar to my own.
I wish more Doctor’s and mother’s for that matter would understand that not all abies or woman can breastfeed. That it does not matter if you breastfeed, formula feed or pump.and use a bottle….As long as the baby/child is eating, thriving and gaining weight is what matters. Neither of my sons could breastfeed due to medical issues and my oldest has a G-TUBE. I did what as best for them both.
I’m wondering if this child was ever checked for a tongue tie! Everything that’s described here makes me think he might have one
Thank you so much for this. I am sailing in the same boat.Lots of love to you and the little one!
I was formula fed as I was adopted. The same thing with my brother. We are both healthy, fully functioning adults. I’m glad you shared this and I definitely agree, fed is best! There is nothing wrong with formula feeding and it does sound like you tried your hardest to breast feed and in the end did what was best for your family.
I went through this with my firstborn as well. Her pediatrician made me feel as if I was doing the right thing when I left the office with the decision to formula feed, but then I encountered society who seemed more interested in judging a new mom and pushing their own thoughts and feelings about the subject upon me. I felt so guilty about not being able to breastfeed that I hid in my home for almost 9 months. I’ve since found my confidence as a mother and am not afraid to stand firm in my decisions, but it’s been a long road. Thank you for sharing your story!
I have a very similar story of everyone reassuring me things were fine until we were on the verge of hospitalizing a dehydrated starving baby!
Then one day I looked at a picture of the day he was born and comparing it to what he looked like now…I was horrified and felt like such a horrible human being for unknowingly almost killing my child!
I didn’t bother with the breastfeeding schedule, I switched right over to pumping and topping up with formula and it saved my baby’s life! He is now a fully formula fed baby, eating well, growing a double chin, sleeping well and developing perfectly!
Fed is best! Always!
Thanks for sharing your story, but it make me sad that it is such a common one.
The guilt will always be there. And yes, more people need to be aware as there are more people out there giving wrong advice to mummies who keep trying and failing but thought they are successful.
I’m happy he is doing great he looks healthy. I also my self just went threw the same thing she didn’t reach her birth weight till 2 months. And breastfeeding is so pushed upon us to do so. I am now successfully half half. And she is a little chunky monkey. Fed baby either or doesn’t matter there health is most important. Beautiful read thanks for sharing though I was the only one. Happy to hear ur success