by Jillian Johnson with commentary from Dr. Christie del Castillo-Hegyi
Landon would be five today if he were still alive. It’s a very hard birthday–five. It’s a milestone birthday. Most kiddos would be starting kindergarten at this age. But not my little guy. I wanted to share for a long time about what happened to Landon, but I always feared what others would say and how I’d be judged. But I want people to know how much deeper the pain gets.
I share his story in hopes that no other family ever experiences the loss that we have.
Jarrod and I wanted what was best for Landon, as every parent does for their child. We took all of the classes. Bought and read all of the books. We were ready! Or so we thought….every class and book was geared toward breastfeeding and how it’s so important if you want a healthy child. Landon was born in a “Baby-Friendly” hospital. (What this means is everything is geared toward breastfeeding. Unless you’d had a breast augmentation or cancer or some serious medical reason as to why you couldn’t breastfeed, your baby would not be given formula unless the pediatrician wrote a prescription.)
Sleeping comfortably a few hours after birth
Landon was born full-term weighing 3360 g or 7 lbs. 7 oz, born by urgent cesarean due to fetal intolerance to labor after the water had broken. [Previous publication of this blog said he had an emergency c-section. He was delivered by low transverse incision over 12-14 minutes, which is considered an urgent, not a STAT section.] Apgars were 8 and 9 and he was stabilized. He was transferred 2.5 hours later to the Mother-Baby Unit and returned to his mother. He exclusively breastfed with excellent latch for 15 – 40 minutes every 1-2 hours.
Landon, is 12 hours old.
Landon was on my breast —ALL OF THE TIME. The lactation consultants would come in and see that “he had a great latch and was doing fine,” but there was one who mentioned I may have a problem producing milk. The reason she gave was that I was diagnosed with PCOS (polycystic ovarian syndrome), and it was just harder for women with hormone imbalances to produce milk. She recommended some herbs to take when I got out of the hospital.
While in the hospital, his mother’s risk factors for failed and delayed lactogenesis II (copious milk production) were identified by the IBCLC-lactation consultant. They were borderline diabetes, PCOS, issues with infertility, small, widely spaced breasts with minimal growth during pregnancy, being a first-time mom, and emergency c-section. Despite that, she was encouraged to exclusively breastfeed. She was closely monitored by a nurse, lactation consultant, and physician support. Her baby’s latch was rated as excellent.
By the first 24 hours, he had nursed a total of 9.3 hours, had zero wet diapers and four dirty diapers. By 27 hours, he had lost 4.76%. His nursing sessions became longer and longer until he was on the breast continuously by the second day of life. On the second day, he produced 3 wet diapers and 6 dirty diapers and nursed for almost 14 hours total. By 53 hours of life, he had lost 9.72%.
At this time, the scientific literature on wet and dirty diaper production has shown that the number of diapers produced have no correlation with adequacy of milk intake in the first 4 days of life. The only study on diaper counts has shown that even newborns who lose excessive weight can produce up to 6 wet and dirty diapers a day. In addition, at this time, the Baby-Friendly Hospital Initiative has produced no data on the safety of newborn fasting and weight loss caused by exclusive colostrum feeding and what degree of weight loss protects a child from brain-threatening complications like hyperbilirubinemia, hypernatremic dehydration, and hypoglycemia. So far, the scientific literature shows that babies who lose greater than 7% of their birth weight are at the highest risk of developing excessive jaundice and hypernatremia to levels that can cause long-term developmental disability. It has also been found that 10% of healthy, term, exclusively breastfed babies undergoing the Baby-Friendly protocol experience hypoglycemia to levels that are associated with 50% declines in the ability to pass the literacy and math proficiency test at 10 years of age, even if aggressively corrected.
Constant, unsatisfied nursing and inconsolable crying are two of the signs of newborn starvation that lead to brain-threatening complications. If a child is receiving a fraction of their caloric requirement through early exclusive breastfeeding, they can experience severe hunger and thirst, which is why they will cry inconsolably and breastfeed continuously when it is the only source of calories and fluid they are offered. If a mother’s colostrum does not meet the child’s caloric requirement, they will breastfeed for hours a day in an attempt to relieve their hunger. A child who is “cluster-feeding” may actually burn more calories breastfeeding than they receive in return, which can result in fasting conditions and accelerated weight loss. The constant nursing and crying often found in newborns by the second day of life have been called“The Second Night Syndrome” in the breastfeeding industry. This is also whenmothers receive the most pressure to avoid supplementation in order to increase rates of exclusive breastfeeding at discharge. Babies who reach critically low levels of reserve fuel and fluids before their mother’s milk comes in can be found lethargic with compromised vital signs after hours of constant nursing and fussing, at which time they are often diagnosed with hypoglycemia, excessive weight loss, and/or hyperbilirubinemia, all markers of starvation.
Did you know that newborns aren’t supposed to cry all of the time? They’re supposed to eat and sleep and dirty their diapers. I had no idea he was inconsolable because he was literally starving. And when a baby is only on the breast, how do we gauge how much they’re actually getting out? Sure, there should be wet and soiled diapers and weight checks, right? And where is the limit as to weight loss and a minimum for the diapers changed?
Being discharged with visible weight loss.
Landon was discharged at 64 hours (2.5 days) of life having lost 9.7% of his birth weight continuously and exclusively breastfeeding with a mother whose milk had not come in. These are routine and unremarkable findings in newborn babies discharged home to exclusively breastfeed. At this time, there are no studies using standardized developmental testing or serum markers of starvation that show that allowing babies to lose up to 10% of their birth weight protects them from brain- and life-threatening complications, despite wide-spread perception that it is normal for exclusively breastfed babies to lose. Therefore, Landon’s mother was given no instruction to supplement. He was discharged with next-day follow-up.
So we took him home….not knowing that after less than 12 hours home with us, he would have gone into cardiac arrest caused by dehydration from unintended starvation because I was the mother who had no colostrum for my baby. The best advice I was given by one of his NICU doctors while he was on life support is that the breast is best, but follow with the bottle if they are still hungry.
This way you know your baby has eaten enough….if only I could go back in time.
Landon continued to breastfeed at home continuously and was found unresponsive, pulseless, and blue after eventually falling asleep from cluster feeding. His parents called 911. Per EMS, he was asystolic (no heart rate), and he received CPR en route to the local ER. By the time they arrived at the ER, he was found to have pulseless electrical activity (heart rate with no blood pressure). There, he was intubated and received several rounds of epinephrine. He was hypothermic with a temperature of 93.1 F. After 30 minutes of CPR, no cardiac activity was found on ultrasound. With parental consent, CPR was stopped, and he was left on the ventilator while continuing to receive IV saline. Twenty minutes later, with IV fluids, he regained his pulse. He was transferred to a Level III NICU to get the head cooling protocol for babies that experience a brain injury. He was diagnosed with hypernatremic dehydration and cardiac arrest from hypovolemic shock.
Landon is in the NICU on full life support.
I still have many, many days of guilt and questions – what if I had just given him a bottle? And anger because how would I have known? I trusted my healthcare professionals to protect my baby from harm. I remember when Stella, my daughter was born, and she was always quiet. I kept asking the nurses what was wrong with her. They said nothing. She’s doing what she’s supposed to. Sleeping and eating. And it was then that I realized that it wasn’t normal for a newborn to cry as much as Landon did. He was just crying out from his hunger. But I didn’t know. I should’ve known. I still struggle daily, feeling as though I failed him.
Landon received a brain MRI in the hospital which confirmed brain injury consistent with hypoxic-ischemic encephalopathy or brain injury from oxygen deprivation due to low blood pressure from dehydration and cardiac arrest. He was diagnosed with diffuse seizure activity on EEG, the consequence of severe, wide-spread brain injury. Given his poor prognosis, he was taken off life support 15 days later. The autopsy report deemed the causes of death were hypernatremic dehydration followed by cardiac arrest causing hypoxic-ischemic encephalopathy (diffuse brain injury).
Jill held Landon as he took his last breaths.
That little boy gave me ten of the most incredible life-changing months. I’ve been humbled. Challenged. My relationships have fallen apart. Some have come back together. I’ve learned forgiveness. And the true meaning of “life is short.” I love hard – to a fault. But I couldn’t live with myself knowing his death was in vain. I’ve learned so many lessons. I’ve learned the true meaning of compassion and unconditional love.
— Jillian Johnson
The Fed is Best Foundation is dedicated to the prevention of newborn and infant starvation from insufficient exclusive breastfeeding. We do so by studying breastfeeding stories sent by mothers and the scientific literature on breastfeeding complications that lead to infant brain injury and death. Since the beginning of our campaign almost two years ago, we have received tens of thousands of newborn and infant starvation stories leading to the complications of hyperbilirubinemia, dehydration, hypernatremia, hypoglycemia, and failure to thrive. These complications occur because the current breastfeeding guidelines have not been studied for safety and operate with little awareness of the caloric and fluid requirements of newborns nor the amount transferred to babies until complications have already occurred. “Just one bottle” can save a child from these tragedies as it is often a mother’s first clue that a child is, in fact, starving from exclusive breastfeeding.
If your baby is experiencing distress and signs and symptoms of starvation, we encourage you to advocate for your child. We encourage mothers to notify hospital administrators if they are pressured to avoid supplementation to alleviate their child’s hunger. You have the right to feed your child, and your child has the right to be fed. No one but your baby knows how close they are to empty. The only way they can communicate distress is by crying. Listen to your baby and listen to your instincts.
Our message is simple. Feed your baby. Feed them as much as they need to stay safe and satisfied.
How to supplement your baby until your milk comes in:
How To Prepare For Supplementing When Breastfeeding Your Baby In The Hospital
Jillian Johnson: My Message To Parents During World Breastfeeding Week-Just One Bottle
http://fedisbest.org/2022/01/nigerian-mother-speaks-out-about-her-babys-death-after-being-told-to-keep-exclusively-breastfeeding-what-she-wants-human-rights-organizations-to-know/
My Baby Suffered And Almost Died–Why Are The Risks Of Exclusive Breastfeeding Not Taught To Mothers?
Just One Bottle Would Have Prevented My Baby’s Permanent Brain Damage from Hypoglycemia
Feeding Your Baby—When Supplementing Saves Breastfeeding and Saves Lives
U.S. Study Shows Baby-Friendly Hospital Initiative Does Not Work
NICU Nurse Discloses Newborn Admission Rates From Breastfeeding Complications in BFHI Unit
Nurses Are Speaking Out About The Dangers Of The Baby-Friendly Health Initiative
http://fedisbest.org/2018/11/neonatal-nurse-practitioner-speaks-out-about-the-dangerous-and-deadly-practices-of-the-bfhi/
Hospital Drops Baby Friendly Program After Doctors Baby Was Harmed
Letter to Doctors and Parents About the Dangers of Insufficient Exclusive Breastfeeding
Two Physicians Describe How Their Baby-Friendly Hospital Put Their Newborn in Danger
I Supplemented My Baby Until My Milk Came In And We Are Still Breastfeeding At 3 Months
Fed is Best Statement to the USDA Regarding the Harms of the Baby-Friendly Hospital Initiative
Nurses Quit Because Of Horrific Experiences Working In Baby-Friendly Hospitals
Nurses Are Speaking Out About The Dangers Of The Baby-Friendly Health Initiative
“Is Baby-Friendly Safe?”: BFHI Safety Issues Discussed at National Neonatology Conference
CONTACT US/VOLUNTEER
THANK YOU FOR YOUR INTEREST IN THE FED IS BEST FOUNDATION!
Our mission statement is:
The Fed Is Best Foundation works to identify critical gaps in the current breastfeeding protocols, guidelines, and education programs and provides families and health professionals with the most up-to-date scientific research, education, and resources to practice safe infant feeding, with breast milk, formula or a combination of both.
Above all, we strive to eliminate infant feeding shaming and eliminate preventable hospitalizations for insufficient feeding complications while prioritizing perinatal mental health.
HOW YOU CAN SUPPORT FED IS BEST
There are many ways you can support the mission of the Fed is Best Foundation. Please consider contributing in the following ways:
- Join us in any of the Fed is Best volunteer and advocacy, groups. Click here to join our health care professionals group. We have: FIBF Advocacy Group, Research Group, Volunteer Group, Editing Group, Social Media Group, Legal Group, Marketing Group, Perinatal Mental Health Advocacy Group, Private Infant Feeding Support Group, Global Advocacy Group, and Fundraising Group. Please send an email to Jody@fedisbest.org if you are interested in joining any of our volunteer groups.
- If you need infant feeding support, we have a private support group– Join us here.
- If you or your baby were harmed from complications of insufficient breastfeeding please send a message to contact@fedisbest.org
- Make a donation to the Fed is Best Foundation. We are using funds from donations to cover the cost of our website, our social media ads, our printing and mailing costs to reach health providers and hospitals. We do not accept donations from breast- or formula-feeding companies and 100% of your donations go toward these operational costs. All the work of the Foundation is achieved via the pro bono and volunteer work of its supporters.
- Sign our petition! Help us reach our policymakers, and drive change at a global level. Help us stand up for the lives of millions of infants who deserve a fighting chance. Sign the Fed is Best Petition at Change.org today, and share it with others.
- Share the stories and the message of the Fed is Best Foundation through word-of-mouth, by posting on your social media page and by sending our FREE infant feeding educational resources to expectant moms that you know. Share the Fed is Best campaign letter with everyone you know.
- Write a letter to your health providers and hospitals about the Fed is Best Foundation. Write to them about feeding complications your child may have experienced.
- Print out our letter to obstetric providers and mail them to your local obstetricians, midwives, family practitioners who provide obstetric care and hospitals.
- Write your local elected officials about what is happening to newborn babies in hospitals and ask for the legal protection of newborn babies from underfeeding and of mother’s rights to honest informed consent on the risks of insufficient feeding of breastfed babies.
- Send us your stories. Share with us your successes, your struggles and everything in between. Every story saves another child from experiencing the same and teaches another mom how to safely feed her baby. Every voice contributes to change.
- Send us messages of support. We work every single day to make infant feeding safe and supportive of every mother and child. Your messages of support keep us all going.
- Shop at Amazon Smile and Amazon donates to Fed Is Best Foundation.
Or simply send us a message to find out how you can help make a difference with new ideas!
For any urgent messages or questions about infant feeding, please do not leave a message on this page as it will not get to us immediately. Instead, please email christie@fedisbest.org.
Thank you and we look forward to hearing from you!
Parents tell us they were not taught how to supplement their babies safely, if necessary to prevent exclusive breastfeeding complications.
For more information on how to protect your baby from feeding complications due to early exclusive breastfeeding, please read and download the Fed is Best Feeding Plan, a way to communicate your feeding choices to your health care providers.
In addition, please read and download the Fed is Best Weighing Protocol to prevent newborn dehydration and failure to thrive.
Lastly, for more detailed information, please watch our educational videos on Preventing Feeding Complications.
Our full list of parent resources can be found on our Resource Page.
If you wish to help parents learn how to protect their newborns from accidental starvation, please share this story and sign our petition to demand that the CDC, the AAP, the U.S. Surgeon General and the WHO/UNICEF Baby-Friendly Hospital Initiative warn parents about the dangers of newborn and infant starvation from insufficient exclusive breastfeeding. Go to http://fedisbest.org/sign-our-petition/.
Please consider making a donation to the Fed is Best Foundation to support its mission of providing safe infant feeding education and support and raise awareness on the harms of insufficient infant feeding.
We believe all babies deserve to be protected from hunger and thirst every single day of their life and we believe that education on Safe Infant Feeding should be free. If you would like to make a donation to support the Fed is Best Foundation’s mission to teach every parent Safe Infant Feeding, please consider making a one-time or recurring donation to our organization.
Donate to Fed is BestThank you so much from the Founders of the Fed is Best Foundation!
Reading your (and the rest) of the stories, I feel deeply saddened, angry and guilty. My daughter was born in 1992. No internet, just books, moms, sisters and docs. I’m a nurse and my dtr was born in the hospital where I worked. At NO TIME did anyone tell me that this was a possibility!!
When I got her home, I had no idea how to be a mom, when they need to be fed….etc. I called my mother, crying in fear. She said “oh, you’ll know” what ???!!
She was right. I did.
But there was one evening w her as a newborn, she was WAILING and WAILING! Frantic!!! I was frantic! I had to hand her off to my then, husband or I thought I might throw her out the window! (Exaggeration)
He took her, I stuck a paci in her mouth and she sucked vigorously and finally stopped. I feel extremely guilty because she was exclusively breast fed till 11 mos. I cried when I weaned her. I’ll bet you, that night, she got no milk! My Irish/ catholic guilt has been settling in since I read this forum.
I’m thinking of you all the time and sharing your story. May god and his babies look upon you and bless your soul. You didn’t know, you didn’t know ……..
Uh, I think she would need more info abt your blog first. EVERY SINGLE woman who gives birth should know this I DO NOT CARE how much of an advocate you are for breastfeeding only ! This poor woman kept going back over and over again Like I said, this HAS to be what happened that ONE TIME w my daughter. I want to make new mothers more aware in any way I can. This poor woman suffered so deeply and will probably never be the same. How can I help?! Please let me know. I will do it. It’s terrifying to think that in today’s day and age, something so serious can happen. She may have a lawsuit on her hands. ( her suing them)
I, myself,cant get out of my mind.
Let’s band together as woman and make a change. Email me directly mickey322@optonlin.net or pm me on FB.
Thus, the pendulum swings the other way.
Parents acting on imperfect information
scared about insufficient breastmilk, afraid to try
cans of formula and bottles sitting on the kitchen counter “just in case.”
Like they have done for millennia before the WHO guidelines. Babies are protected from starvation caused by insufficient milk because we fed them with our brains, not just our breasts. The biological norm is being fed which is the reason exclusive breastfeeding rates are low, world-wide. No mother wants her child to starve and the WHO has been pressure them to starve their babies in the false belief that exclusive breastfeeding is best for every single child. For Landon, exclusive breastfeeding was lethal.
I totally agree with baby friendly being to pushy. I am also a nicu nurse and they drill breastfeeding into our brains! However, it is our responsibility as nurses specialized in this area, to remember we are FIRST there to SAVE LIVES and pick up on potential problems! Of course breastfeeding is best if your body cooperates! Every body doesn’t! Mothers feel like they have been stripped of their right to make their own decisions about feeding methods and this is just wrong!
I am so sorry about your loss, Jillihan… my heart is just torn apart. Thank you very much for sharing it with people! I can’t hold my tears every time I think about your story and picturing what could happen to my baby. Here is my story: I and my husband were so happy to finally meet our baby girl last November. While I was pregnant we did everything to learn and prepare as much as we could – went to Lamaz classes, read a lot , asked friends and relatives about their experience etc. Our first baby! I Was surprised how often people asked me if I was going to breastfeed and when I would say yes people would almost applaud me. The baby came and we went to momma-baby classes, where I asked lots of questions. I am from another country and there people do some things differently and when I asked couple questions trying to share with that country experience and fond out what is really recommended now a days the lady who’s class it was (who is a head of an educational department in a hospital I gave a birth) said – well I have never heard about that, your country has uneducated people probably (!) and laughed. Since then I have decided – I am not going back there, never again even my husband wanted me to. I was collecting opinions from others and doctors. My mom had 2 kids and at some point she stopped having enough milk for us and started mixed feeding. Thank God she was with me for a first month, she flew from the other country to help me out with a baby for a first month – otherwise I can’t even imagine what could happen to my baby!!! My husband always wanted our baby to be exclusively breastfed just like him and his other 5 siblings were, all the propaganda brainwashed him and almost me as well that milk is a fluid just like tears or sweat and there is no way you don’t have enough milk. I felt huge pressure from everyone – hospital, pediatricians, my husband’s mom, who had 6 kids herself and her sister, who had 8 kids as well and all were breastfed only- I love my husbands side of a family and I didn’t want to offend them, but I had a feeling my baby does not eat enough and i must do something right now because my baby would cry and cry and she was skinny like from a concentration camp! Me and my mom we secretly bought formula and started to supplement her while my husband wouldn’t see. I realized it’s not right, but didn’t know what to do. By the way, my husband made an appointment with with a lactation consultant (a lady who was his lactation consultant when he was a baby , 40 years of extra erience) and I agreed to go just for him hoping that she will help me to explain my husband that there is not enough milk and we need formula ( I could pump no more than 4 oz a day only). When I mentioned formula lactation consultant shelved her head, she was acting like I was going to do something criminal, she said look at you you have milk enough to feed twins now! She showed me how to make baby comfortable, we talked about my pump and she said – we will make your body to produce more milk, we made another appointment. I kept supplementing her secretly with formula. Another appointment happened in 2 weeks, but I already had made my decision – I will follow my instincts and do what I feel is right to do for my baby. But I decided to show up and just asked one question – can you prove me with facts abscess numbers that I produce enough ? And she said – I would not do it cus u r fine but okay , okay – pump 4 times in a row, every hour , from both sides and send me results , I will count. I did. The result was shocking !!!! She sent me a text message that I do not produce enough and I need to supplement with a formula like I do!!!! It took 2 weeks since she finally realized that I don’t produce enough!!!! The very 1st thing she should do as a lactation consultant is to figure out how much I am producing and if it’s enough ! Every person is unique just like every animal (excuse me for this comparing, but – there are meat cows and there are milk cows , right ? And it doesn’t matter what constitution your body has and what size of breasts you have – doesn’t matter !), so if I would’ve listen to this lady only God knows what could of happen!!! That was a moment of truth, I sat with my husband and said – I am the mother, I will follow my got feelings and my instincts since now, I will give her all the breast milk I have till the last drop , but she needs more and I will give her formula no matter what people think and say! There are only few reasons baby can cry for:
1) your baby is uncomfortable (cold/hot, not comfy clothes, dirty diaper еtc)
2) your baby is not feeling well (reaction on shots, fleu, gasses, rashes etc)
3) your baby is hungry/thirsty.
I am not trying to sabotage people not to listen to doctors at all, there is nothing better and more valuable than a breast milk, but everyone’s situation is different. There is nothing to be ashamed of here! Read,educate yourself,don’t be afraid to ask questions again and again, if you still have same question in your head it means you were not satisfied with all the answers, that’s your body and mother instincts talking to you, collect opinions, change a doctor if you have doubts!
And at the end I wanted to say… Jillihan, thank you again for sharing… do not blame yourself, that is not your fault, there are so many women who don’t have anyone to take their hand and to walk them to the right direction like my mom did! Stay strong and God bless you and your wonderful family!
Thank you for sharing your story. I feel like this could have happened to me. My daughter was born at almost 9lbs, I was exclusively breast feeding per the pressure of my doctors and family. When she was 2 months old I had a stranger ask me if she was born prematurely because she was so thin. I guess it was a blessing that I had to go back to work after 3 months. I could not pump enough breastmilk to leave with the babysitter for a whole day so I had to start my daughter on formula. She went from being tiny and in the 19th percentile to being in the 90th percentile in just one doctor’s visit. Clearly she was starving but through those first few months of her life everyone kept encouraging me to drink more water and take herbs and it would get better. This being my first baby I just didn’t know any better. She will be 5 in May. Thank you for speaking out. God bless you.
Can I just say how happy I am that the tone is changing surrounding breastfeeding, at least for some sane individuals? I am angry that so many, including myself, were made to feel less than and guilty because we couldn’t make it work with one or all of our children. There is way too much pride surrounding how we feed our babies, and when that happens, it’s time for the pendulum to swing back in the other direction, quite frankly. Utter stupidity is what has taken over. And much of the time, it’s not so much lack of milk production as it is the fact that some babies just can’t remove enough milk. How is that the mother’s fault? And sometimes we just don’t have the support or time to try to make it work. I had a great experience nursing my second baby, a horrific one trying to nurse my third. I know my body works the way it’s supposed to in that I started out with plenty of milk, but because of issues with her latch, my supply tanked, and it didn’t work out. Simple as that. What matters is I fed her. The end. This trying to shame women….saying things like “your milk is no good”, or “you just didn’t persevere enough” or another one of the barbs that other mothers and so-called professionals like to throw around to feel better about themselves…..I’m just so fed up. I’ve seen firsthand babies remain ridiculously small and underweight because someone had to prove a point. This is criminal. And I’m sorry if I sound calloused but a baby who is not back to their birth weight by 2 months?? Someone should be prosecuted for neglect. We need to get over ourselves. FED IS BEST.
Really touching story…
I am a mother of four. I have buried two of my children. My oldest son died at 19 from an abdominal aneurysm in the middle of the night while sleeping two days before Thanksgiving. My youngest daughter experienced a failure to thrive in the womb which the doctor failed to catch. She died from starvation the day before I had her due to multiple blood clots in the placenta and cord due to an as yet undiagnosed blood clotting disorder. Once it was determined that my daughter had died in utero, I was sent home for the night and ordered to return at 7am to be induced. For six agonizing hours I labored to bring my daughter into the world. The grief was agonizing and I could not stop crying because I knew she would never draw a breath. I buried my children 22 years apart.
Jillian, you are not to blame. I am not to blame. I understand your grief, and I grieve with you. It is my fondest hope that your Landon rests in sweet company with my Danielle and Nicholas. I love you, and I wish you God’s peace.
Your story is incredibly heartbreaking. Thank you for sharing it, your willingness to do so may very well save a life.
Just a note: perhaps it should be ‘small, widely spaced BREASTS with minimal growth during pregnancy’ rather than ‘small, widely spaced nipples with minimal growth during pregnancy,’
Thank you!
Thank you for sharing your important story! I can’t imagine your sorrow! This could have been me 34 years ago with my first daughter. I was 28 and despite having tiny breasts was told all women could breast feed. She cried nonstop for 5 days. At that time, babies did not return to a pediatrician for 2 weeks. Luckily, my own father was a retired GP and had delivered and cared for hundreds of babies. He and my mother(who had difficulties breastfeeding) came over and said to get some formula now. My next door neighbor had a small baby and brought over a can. Thank God that’s all it took. Same scenario with my second one 5 years later, but I was ready with sugar water and formula. Both of my daughter’s had the same issues with breastfeeding, but were better informed and followed by a pediatrician.
Exclusive breast feeding is just over rated.My baby was always crying with a high pitch. Although they gave me 10% dextrose water at the hospital to give baby till my breast starts producing milk but ahe refused to take it.She will always spit it out then coming to the breast, she will suck then remove her mouth cos she wasn’t sucking anything out&wasn’t even producing any urine at all in the first 72hours of birth plus my nipple was inverted.
I got a breast pump&it extracted the nipple but I couldn’t pump much milk because I wasn’t sleeping at all&wasn’t eating much or taking much fluids.Went for 5days check up&baby ended up been admitted with jaundice&severe dehydration.
I thank God I stood my grounds & started bottle feeding. My husband refused cos he was so brain washed that exclusive breast feeding will make d kids to have exceptional IQ (BS).
Well I continued bottle feeding&supplemented with breastmilk&everything was then on roller coaster.
This story breaks my heart cause the death would have been prevented with bottle. Don’t feel guilty please
Dear Jill and family,
I am so incredibly sorry for your loss. Unimaginable. I have read your story through a wall of tears. Thank you for sharing your story – beyond brave. I have two little ones of my own, and even after a couple of weeks of looking at the Fed Is Best Foundation website and signing the petition, for myself personally I STILL struggled to unwarp the breast is best message that had been burnt in my brain and that has caused my family so much anguish after two years of me suffering pnd and pn anxiety, which has ripped through our lives as a direct result of pressure to exclusively breastfeed. That is how intense the pressure had been. Now, after reading your story, if we are blessed with more children in the future, I will not hesitate to give them a bottle of formula if breastfeeding is proving unsuccessful and my baby needs to be fed. That is my promise to you. I will also work hard to spread the Fed Is Best message with great gusto and positivity as much as I am able over hear in Australia. My family and I are the praying kind, so be assured of our prayers for you, your family, and precious little boy.
All the very best from Qld, Australia,
Catherine McCumstie
Thanks you so much! my baby was constantly breastfeeding last night and I thought it was bad to give her a bottle. I came to know about the cluster feed and thought it was ok, but she was so hype that I had to look again on the internet and I found your story, I immediately gave her a bottle without finishing to read. thank you so much! god bless you!
Thank you for sharing this. This story breaks my heart! When I give birth, the doctor won’t allow me to bottle feed and force me to breastfeed but the problem is, my son is always hungry. I love breastfeeding him but my nipples becomes sore and it hurts a lot whenever my baby latch on it. I confided with my sister about it and she advised me to switch to formula. A neighbor who visited me shared that she is bottle feeding her baby with Hipp from this site https://myorganicformula.com/ and that I can rely on their formula for my baby’s needs to grow strong and healthy since the company has been researching breastmilk for over 50 years. After that, I decided to try Hipp as well and my baby loves it! After reading this article, thank goodness, I listened to my sister and neighbor!
Thanks for this great post. i really appreciate your blog.
The best place for learning.
<3